Dating After 50: TikTok Made Me the Dating Guy

All right, Pedro, you ready? All right, let's do this. And we're on. Apparently, the internet is interested in my dating life. Let me dive into it. I think probably a month and a half ago, I did a post on TikTok. And I have several accounts of TikToks, but TikTok never worked for me. I didn't understand TikTok. I was like, why even post on here? But I was screwing around one night, and I go... And I had like on one account, I have like, it was like 2000 something friends or whatever. I have acquaintances. I don't know what they are. And I was trying to live stream from actually here in the studio to see if I was able to take the, these high end cameras and stream. And you know, no one popped up and one of my clients and good friend, Dan O'Brien popped up and we were talking back and forth and no one popped into the live stream. I'm like, what the heck? So I turned everything off and I was like, okay, cool. I know it works. And I went over in the corner over there in one of the chairs and I took my phone out, this phone right here, and basically said, attention Florida singles, where does a 50-year-old go to hang out if you don't go to bars and you don't do this? And it took off. And the next day I did another video and it took off. And then after that, another one took off. And still every day these videos are still hitting, people are responding to these things. So I was going to start a, well, I had a meetup set. which was for like last weekend. And I got really, really sick and I had to cancel it. So now some people think I was just, I don't know, they were saying, well, is this guy genuine? Yeah, I'm a real person and I have intent to do these meetups. But now I feel like I'm labeled with that TikTok account that I'm Mr. Dating Expert. And why is it the things that take off for me on the internet are always things that I'm not really passionate about? And one of them is dating because, quite frankly, I'm not passionate about dating because I'm not dating at all. I just don't. I don't go out and look to date, take women on dates. The only thing close enough of me going hanging out with a woman was, what, two weeks ago when I hung out with my friend Michelle at Epcot, but that wasn't really a date. We're friends. So... Why? I don't want to be labeled the dating guy on the internet or not the internet, but TikTok. And so now these four videos I've done, I'm not even kidding you. I think the growth on TikTok, I got like 3000 new people that follow me on TikTok based off this dating shout out into the atmosphere. But what do you do? And I think when I did it, my intention to write, I was like, well, Maybe it is, it is time that I get out and put myself out there and, and just see who's out there. And I've talked to a few people on the phone and, you know, just sharing my past and everybody has a story and it's just awkward. It's just awkward out there. And I, and, and having a few conversations with people on the phone, Just made me think like, I like where I'm at right now. I like being single. I like being able to come in the studio on a Friday night and recording the Jeff Adams show and not have to answer to anybody. I just go and do it. Turn on the keys and go. Don't answer to anybody. Don't have to worry about anybody. Like, well, are you coming home? And when you have that kind of freedom, it's kind of hard to leverage that. I don't care what kind of person. would come along in a life. I know that sounds crazy, but what I've been through in my life, which I'm seeing what a lot of other people have been through, the peace and the solitude and the freedom is so much more worth than being in a relationship. Because granted, yes, I've had moments in relationships where it was good, but I'm single and there's a reason why I'm single because the relationships went bad. A lot of it, which when you do work in your life, like I did, uh, for myself, um, you know, it's true to blame, you know, it's not always one person's fault, but majority of times when I hear people on Tik TOK, they're blasting an ex and calling the ex a narcissist or, you know, battling through, I'm a woman and I'm going to recover and things. And I just think about that. When I went through what I went through in 2022, I took some time off, but then I started a vlog. I started like this recovery vlog of me trying to start over, which started the channel called Creative On Demand. It was one of the first channels I started. And I realized I was just putting my stuff out there. And I'm like, I look back and all those videos are private now, but I look back at that time and go, I wish I'd never really done any of that because I look at that person and said, who was I? Who was I? I was so broken and I was so confused because the person that I thought I was, I was not. And then the person who I was trying to portray or trying to talk my way through doing a vlog, I didn't even know who I was then. Now I know who I am. I know who I am. And there's bits of pieces of my past that defined who I am. But I see a lot of people on TikTok and just going through pain and hurt. And I thought about that. I'm like, man, if they look at this video in the next three to five years and look back, are they going to be proud of letting it all out on the internet or TikTok or wherever it might be? Are they going to be proud of Because you can't help yourself through the process. I know I've said that before, and a lot of it is. It's self-expression. It's cheaper than a counselor or seeing a shrink or whatever. It is. But the end result is, if you're looking for the validation or the likes or the self-approval. You're doing it for the wrong reasons. You're doing it for something that's internally broken inside you. And that's what I came to realize. I'm like, I don't even know who I am. And I'm sure people that thought they knew who I was and they saw me online and they go, who is this person? I didn't even know who I was. I mean, I knew who I was because I surrendered my life to God. But when you do that, you lose everything. because that's what it takes. And through that, you find who you really are and what you're called to be. Now, granted, there's some things, nothing's ever perfect in life. But I say all that because when you do the work, when you put in the time and you focus on yourself and getting yourself better out of years of just going from relationship to relationship and And I think even the time I was married for 15 years, I just, I should have never been married. I was, I had so many issues. Now, granted, you're never going to be perfect, right? And some people can work through problems. Some people can't. But I think this generation now, my age of people, we've been through so much, so much of rejection and pain and hurt. We've given it out. We've received it. that when you're in your 50s or in your 40s, you're kind of like, I can live without this. I don't need the grief. And I realize just some things in general, too, of just talking to people. And I'm not the judge because I've been in crazy places in my life, said some things, but You see people's character a lot clearer now with things that you just would kind of brush underneath the rug when you have conversations with people and you see them. You go, oh, wow. Okay. You kind of jot that down and go, is she worth talking more about this? And I start making mental notes and jotting things down. I'm like, no, she's not. And that's not to discredit them because they're a nice person. But when you cross that line, I said, man, that's going to be a big red flag. And people talk a lot about red flags on online dating. Red flag, red flag. Dude, there should be a huge flag that covers the whole online dating scene because it's a mess. It's people trying to do a temporary fix. They're not looking for long-term love. I mean, they think they are, but they're not ready for it yet. And that's the sad thing about why I don't want to be the TikTok guy, dating guy. But I look at it as an opportunity too, because I wanted to start a group, not a singles group per se. It's based around singles, people that are lonely in life, but you don't have to be single. You can be a creative or you're new to the area. I want to start doing these meetups and you can go to on the and join an email list. I don't know what I'm going to do the next one. Well, it would be the first one because the last one I had to cancel because I got sick. But it's to find people that want to do things, that want to go maybe to Disney on an evening one night. just do meetups. There's no pressure. It's like the thing I hate about single meetups is this pressure. All these people are showing up. I'm going to find my next husband or wife. I'm going to find my next relationship. And that's just so dumb. It's so dumb, right? Why do people just rush to relationships? I did it. I say us people because I was one of those people. I don't do that anymore. I want to get to know somebody. I want to get, there's no pressure. There's no pressure to jump into something and to see if anything works. Because when you hang out with somebody or you hang out with groups of people, you can get to know people for who they are and accept them like, hey, they're really cool, but they're going to be a friend. They're not going to be able to cross the line. So that's the whole point of why I want to do onthemenmeetups.com is because of that. And if I got to be the TikTok dating guy, I guess, or whatever it's called, I don't I guess I'll embrace that, I guess. It's just part of it. It's some of the things I'm just not passionate about, but I'm passionate about community. I'm passionate about people not being alone when they're lonely. Because it's not a good place to be. But I've embraced it. I've embraced where I'm at. And I do like my peace. Now, granted, I love being around people too. I do. And when it's time for me around people, I get around people. But to each his own. I know some people just are wired to be in relationship. That's great. There's nothing wrong with that. But for me, like right now, whoever that person might be or not be, they would have to be someone really special that I know is like, I can't breathe anymore. Without that person. And granted. That sounds like a movie. Because I'm a romantic at heart. A film connoisseur. But quite frankly. I don't think I will ever find that. Because. It just doesn't work that way. It doesn't. And if it does. I'll come back. And retract this statement. Until next time. Boy that was a serious one. Pedro. You're over there weeping. Pedro, we can't have you weeping on the job. Get us out of here, Pedro. Peace out.